Today I Flee

Today, I flee. I don't want to think about the yard or the house or plans for the holiday seasons or presents to buy or groceries we need or phone calls and emails that need returned or bills that need paid or work that needs doing on the vehicles or laundry to pick up or cleaning out the attic and washroom or how I can get closer to the kids on my bus or why I never feel like I've had enough sleep or why I seem to never be able to get to the Y or the reason that I really participate in service activities or why I get up and go to church every Sunday or how I can face more years of doing the same thing day after day. I don't want to think about an actual retirement that I have no faith will come or plan for a future funeral that I'm sure will come. I've grown up but now I realize that I want to be Peter Pan. Today, I flee. I go to where I can meet people I've never met. I go to where I can hear stories that I've never heard. I go to stroll the quiet streets of small towns and to enjoy the energy of big cities. I go to where there isn't a single other person within miles and miles. I go to where I can worship God as I watch the Atlantic Ocean wash the shores of Mount Desert Island in Maine. I go to where I can worship God as the sun sets on the Pacific coast of Northern California. I go to where I can worship God as I gaze in awe at Colorado mountains that are so tall they seem able to touch heaven. I go to a place where no one knows me and puts no expectations on me. I go to a place where I put no expectations on myself. I go to where I can sleep when I feel the need or never sleep if there is no desire. I go to a place I can taste different tastes, breath different air, and drink water that doesn't taste like home. Today, I flee. Today, I flee. I don't flee work. I can drive a school bus. I go to find a job driving in North Dakota or in central Nebraska or in the panhandle of Texas. I can do taxes. I go to find work preparing tax returns in upstate New York or in southern Illinois or in the Four Corners of New Mexico. If need be, I can flip burgers. I go to find that job in Ohio or in rural Mississippi or in Idaho. I don't flee to find a job in God's service. For a year I've marked time waiting for that to happen and it hasn't. Today, I flee. Today, I flee. I flee with Sara and a dog. I need no one else. I will miss family. I will miss friends. I will miss the familiar surroundings. I'll miss the hoopla of the holidays, but I won't be lonely. On Christmas eve, I'll serve meals at a homeless shelter and thank God that I have been able to flee. Those who are homeless, not by choice, cannot flee. Today, I flee. Today, I flee. I drive when I can. I take a bus or train or catch a ride or walk when I must. I travel light and I live simply. I don't need a multi-room house. I don't need to own many things. Libraries have books and newspapers and computers. Today, I flee. No, today, I do not flee. The desire to flee is almost overpowering. The reasons I need to flee are legitimate. My love for Sara is my anchor. I can't leave her and she won't leave. My sincere prayer is that however long she lives, I'll live one day less. I never want to live without her. If that prayer is not answered and she leaves me alone, on that day, I flee.

Marching for God

For those who don't live in the Winston-Salem area or don't follow local news, here are the simple facts. The town of King, NC (less than 20 miles from Winston-Salem) has been flying a Christian flag, among other flags, though no other religious flags, at a Veteran's Memorial in a city park. One King citizen, himself a veteran, complained to the city council that the flag might be an affront to persons of other religions or no religion who had fought and perhaps even died for their country in military service. The King City Council and the city attorney received letters from the ACLU of NC and the Americans United for the Separation of Church and State urging the City Council to remove the flag in that it was a violation of the First Amendment of the Constitution of the United States. The council voted to remove the flag. Last Saturday, according to the Winston-Salem Journal, "more than 5,000 people marched and rallied in the city of King to tell its city council to return the Christian flag to the Veteran's Memorial." The Journal quotes one of the marchers as saying, "This community (King) stands together to support the Christian flag. It stands for God, peace, love, purity and the blood of Jesus." That brings us to this blog entry. I confess that I have no patience with 5,000 persons marching for a flag. I don't know how long the parade actually lasted, but let's just say that the average marcher spent 2 hours from home to home including the march. Maple Springs, my church, uses about 50 persons to pack 2,000 meals for Stop Hunger Now in about 2 hours. If the marchers would put the same effort into SHN and my math doesn't fail me, they could pack 200,000 meals to be used to feed the hungry. The Samaritan Inn in Winston-Salem is a homeless shelter that feeds its guests breakfast and dinner each day. I have no real idea, but let's just say that they could easily use 10 volunteers per day to spend a night and prepare and serve the meals. If those 5,000 marchers all volunteered for just one night each, the Samaritan Inn wouldn't need to go begging for volunteers again for the next year and a half! How many houses do you think that Habitat for Humanity could build using the manpower of 5,000 persons? You want to march? I don't believe that the walks to cure breast cancer or diabetes or heart disease would turn you down. 5,000 walkers would probably totally overwhelm them. If you don't like those, organize your own marches for the hungry, the homeless, the refugee, the jobless, the uneducated, the underpaid who serve us so well (nurses, teachers, policemen, firemen, trash collectors, etc.), or so many other needy and deserving causes. The Winston-Salem Journal also quoted one marcher as saying that "They've taken God out of our schools and now they're trying to take our flag." I think that there is real irony in claiming to worship an almighty god and then claiming that man has the ability to remove that god from places where his presence is not wanted. What kind of almighty god is that? My god has asked me to help him spread the knowledge of his love and mercy, but so far, he hasn't asked that I defend him. I'm quite confident that he is capable of doing that for himself. Did you notice the word "purity" in the earlier quote. That word, alone, gives me chills. I was thinking that we got past that pretty early. Paul did take the word of Christ's dying for our sins to both the Jew and the Gentile, didn't he? What does purity mean in King? Must you be a WASP (white, Anglo-Saxon, protestant) to be accepted in King. If you are of a different religion, skin color, sexual orientation, etc. will you not be welcome? If you choose to not wave the Christian flag or, please say it's not true, you are a card-carrying member of the ACLU will you be escorted to the town limits? If you are a disciple of Christ disguised as a short, fat school bus driver who just doesn't agree with your flag waving position, will you still be welcome in your churches? One thing I know is that my church is into this "purity" thing 100%. Each and every one of us who attend Maple Springs is for sure purely a sinner! I will now attempt to get down off my soapbox without breaking anything. God is good!

Faith

She's laying there, asleep on the den rug. The warmth of the sun, shining through the patio doors, has finally robbed her of her vigilant guarding of the back yard. Just for the moment, birds can fill themselves at the feeders. The bravest of the chipmunks can climb up on the deck to try and recover any seeds the birds might scatter. Squirrels are free to tiptoe across the yard toward the bird feeders. Even the fat rabbit comfortably stuffs herself in the patch of wild strawberries that grows in the back corner. I'm sure she dreams. Her paws twitch. She almost has a smile on her face as a small moan escapes her. As she sleeps, she is finally able to catch that darn fat rabbit before it escapes into the deeper growth on the hill. A full belly, a safe bed, warmth of the sunshine. How could life be any better? "Come on", I tell her. She cracks one eye a bit and looks at me like I'm crazy, before settling back into a more comfortable position. Again, I tell her, "Let's go. I have things for us to do and I can't wait all day for you to sleep." That finally gets her attention. After all, going someplace with me is probably her third favorite thing to do, after eating and sleeping. In the back of her trusting, but intelligent eyes, I can almost read her thoughts. "Okay, I'll go, but I don't see you carrying any extra food or water in case I get hungry or thirsty. And what about my blanket? If we have to spend the night somewhere, I definitely want to be warm and comfortable. Oops! I see that you also don't have my favorite toy. You know, that's my most precious possession and I don't want to take a chance on someone taking it while we are gone wherever it is we're going." I look deep into those same eyes and say, "I want you to go with me. I love you and I won't let anything bad happen to you." That does it! She leaps to her feet, takes a quick doggie type stretch, and races to the kitchen door as if to say, "For you I'd do anything and follow you anywhere. Let's go do the work you have for us to do." I pray that I can live up to Pepper's expectations. I also pray that my faith in Christ, like Pepper's faith in me, will get me up and following, no matter how comfortable I am and no matter where that calling to follow might lead.

The Big Yellow Bus

Faith... For some reason, the Winston-Salem / Forsyth County school system has entrusted me with the safety and well being of 60+ students and a brand new school bus. Okay, all false modesty aside, I did score very well on the 5 days of classroom instruction and on the 3 days of driving. A very big difference, however, is that none of those children were around during my training. I'm running a route for middle school and one for high school each morning and afternoon. I take them to school in the morning and home again in the afternoon. I've just finished my first week and it has not been dull. For one thing, my morning route begins at 5:45 a.m. I don't have very many students who are "morning" people. If I'm very lucky, I'll get a grunt when I greet them, "Good morning!" Most of the time, I get ignored. In the afternoon, things change. The high school students will smile and return my greetings. The middle school kids make more racket than I heard at the last Wake Forest home basketball game. What are they feeding them at lunch? If I owned Red Bull, I would be checking the lunchroom leavings for energy ingredients I could use in my product. So far though things are working out. I ignore the middle schoolers and the high schoolers ignore me. One morning we ran about 10 minutes behind because of a Jack-in-the-Box puppy. I opened the bus doors and a student and dog got on. The dog had great fun playing "catch me if you can" and the kids already on the bus helped him when they could. The puppy's young girl owner finally caught him and took him off. As soon as she set him down, back in again he popped. After about a half dozen times of this new game, we finally got the timing down to the point that I was able to shut the door as the girl slid through and the puppy bumped his nose on a closed door. I think that we learned together that the best place for this dog each morning was in the house and not at the stop. My routes have several places where it is necessary to back up into a side road in order to turn around. My bus is 43 feet long, so it isn't an easy thing to turn it around in bright sunlight. It is very difficult in the dark and especially in the dark when it is raining. Most roads are not 43 feet wide. I know this because I have put both ends of the bus over the edges of the road. One morning, in the dark and rain, I got past a turn I was supposed to make. I looked for a place to do a back and turn and picked the wrong place. I backed up into a ditch and, had it been dry, would have been okay, but it was raining and had been for several hours. The back wheels sank to the axle. I got on the radio and announced to Control and all buses on my particular channel that I was stuck in a ditch on Vienna-Dozier Road. Control asked me, "Where on Vienna-Dozier?" Intelligently and in full possession of my emotions, I fired right back, "All the way across it! I'm blocking both lanes." Every driver using our staging lot has managed to find the time to kid me about that answer. Well, every school system car that had a blinking light, an extra bus, a huge wrecker, the highway patrol, and every homeowner within a 1/2 mile radius showed up for the spectacle. I stood by myself, in the rain, figuring that not only was I going to be fired, I was going to be made to walk home. Well, I'm still driving, but I think that, should I get caught even sneezing while driving the bus now, it will be the end of my job. To make the day even worse, on the afternoon route, my brand new bus over heated, had to be parked half way around the route until a mechanic came with coolant, and could not complete the high school portion of the run because of timing. Yesterday was some better although much colder. I couldn't get the heater to work. The high school students were much too sophisticated to say anything about something as mundane as being cold. On the other hand, I knew exactly how many middle school students I had on board because each one took it upon himself or herself to tell me that they were not only cold, they were freezing to death. The school system has faith in me. I have faith in me. Underneath it all, I think the children and parents have faith in me too. The thing that I have to do now is to continue to give them reason for that faith. It won't hurt to remember that the bus is 43 feet long too.

Tired

I am so very tired this morning. I feel like I am slogging along with a full pack, rifle, helmet all through ankle deep sand. It is a beautiful morning in Winston-Salem, at least weather-wise. On the other hand, the hearts and souls of my fellowman seem to be dark and ugly. As Christians, we often speak of God sightings. It is no wonder that we do so. There is so much bad going on that we have to be especially vigilant just to see God at work. On a morning like this morning, I want to raise my face to the skies and shout "Why?" Why do You make the skies so beautiful, the leaves so colorful, the birds to sing, but the hearts of your own children so ugly? So many of us are so often filled with hate that not only can we not wear the cloak of our religious beliefs, but we can't put on the cloak of compassion and we even have difficulty wearing the cloak of civilized human beings. I read in the paper that a gay young college student commits suicide because of an extremely cruel stunt pulled by his roommate. I read in the paper that a NC state legislator, running unopposed, sent out an email disparaging those of a different sexual orientation in words that, in a better world, would make him withdraw from the election in embarrassment. I read in the paper that people are being burned to death in a toxic mudslide. Do you believe for a minute that those responsible for the dump site didn't know what they were doing or that they cared? I watch a family join in prayer at a restaurant table and a young person reading from the Bible in a coffee shop. Then I hear a college professor tell me in all seriousness that, "Of course all Muslims are terrorists. It is in their nature." On the Internet, I hear that our President is a closet Muslim and that all Hispanics in the US are illegal aliens. I once again raise my face to the sky and shout, "Why? Why can't we love with even a bit of the amount of energy that we use to hate?" I am only one person. I can't change the world and I despair of even making very slight changes to my corner of it. In 1959, fifty years ago, the Kingston Trio released an album containing a song titled, "The Merry Minuet". I'm going to put a copy of the lyrics at the bottom of this blog entry. With just a very few changes in the wording, it is still most applicable today. So, you "Big Bang" theorists, be looking for a bright light in the skies above India, or Israel, or Iran, or North Korea, or Pakistan, Russia, or perhaps even the United States. Maybe that big bang, accompanied by a mushroom shaped cloud will be the announcement of the end of the world as we know it. On a morning like this morning, I almost hope so.

The Merry Minuet

Kingston Trio

Sheldon Harnick

They're rioting in Africa. They're starving in Spain. There's hurricanes in Florida, and Texas needs rain.The whole world is festering with unhappy souls. The French hate the Germans, the Germans hate the Poles.Italians hate Yugoslavs, South Africans hate the Dutch. And I don't like anybody very much!But we can be tranquil and thankful and proud, for man's been endowed with a mushroom-shaped cloud.And we know for certain that some lovely day, someone will set the spark off... and we will all be blown away.They're rioting in Africa. There's strife in Iran. What nature doesn't do to us... will be done by our fellow man. God is good?